Video 24 Jul 51 notes

weneeddiversebooks:

The #WNDB team is DELIGHTED to announce that it has recently welcomed some new team members! We’ll be highlighting them on this site over the next few days. Please give a warm welcome to Kristy Shen and Bryce Leung, who have been working night and day as newly-minted #WNDB Webmasters. 

Bryce and Kristy are engineers and a husband and wife writing tag-team Their awesome middle grade debut Little Miss Evil (Spencer Hill Middle Grade) comes out March 1, 2015. Here’s the blurb for their book:

When you live in a volcano, ride to school in a helicopter, and regularly see your dad on the news with the caption “EVIL GENIUS” underneath his picture, it takes a lot to rattle you.

Until you get a message that says: We have your father. Deliver the NOVA in 24 hours or we will kill him.

What’s a NOVA you ask? It’s a nuclear bomb capable of turning the city into a radioactive mushroom cloud, and ever since Fiona’s dad built it, it’s caused nothing but grief. But telling him to stop building weapons is like telling Michelangelo to stop painting.


And that’s why thirteen-year-old Fiona has a flamethrower strapped to her arm. After all, who’d mess with a girl who can throw fireballs?

Apparently, these guys.

Big mistake.

Give Bryce and Kristy a warm welcome by adding Little Miss Evil to your Goodreads shelf. And when our amazing new #WNDB website goes up, know that they deserve the lion’s share of the credit! 

Yay, Bryce and Kristy!!!

Hey, I know them, we’re represented by the same literary agency. :)

Text 24 Jul 1 note I suck at titles

If someone who is good at naming things could help me out that would be nice. I wrote a short story that I am having trouble naming and if you want to read it and suggest a title that would be cool. E-mail me or talk to me. Also happy to take comments on its suckiness as a story to make it less sucky as a story.

It is approximately 10,000 words and contains multiple queer people and no sex but discussions of sex sometimes. And lots of crapping on the tropes that rule relationship expectations.

Liiiiiiiike contact me if you wanna read my story.

Text 22 Jul 15 notes spellcheck

Today I was editing a document at work and my spellchecker pointed out the words “to” and “address” had been squished together with no space.

It suggested I correct “toaddress” to “toad dress.”

I have been laughing since.

Now I want some Tumblr artists to draw me some toad dresses.

Text 22 Jul 52 notes Sass

hell-is-okcupid:

http://i547.photobucket.com/albums/hh466/Jellybean_Disaster/sass_zps57ee7c25.jpg

So, what you mean is, even though you aren’t interested in what I have to say, I should still pay attention to you?

oh ok

I got something just like this once. The guy said my profile was too long and that he literally wanted me to e-mail him a short summary. He praised my pictures and expected me to be flattered.

Honey. If your criteria of who you want to talk to consists of them being a certain hotness and my picture has fulfilled that requirement, and what she says in her profile is of so little interest to you that you want someone to mail you a Cliff’s Notes version so you can do a half-assed job of understanding her AS IF THE ACTUAL INTERACTION WITH HER MIND IS FRIGGING HOMEWORK YOU WANT HER TO HAND-HOLD YOU THROUGH, I can promise you right now that WE ARE NOT WHAT EACH OTHER ARE LOOKING FOR.

And if you’d read even the first paragraph of my profile then you’d know that. I am trying to make it easier for you people to not bother talking to me if I would be such a waste of your precious time. And then you still want me to humor you as if you have something I want.

Photo 21 Jul 17 notes spacejuliet:

swankivy:

So You Write comic #38: Hater Love.
This may be exaggerated, but it’s true for me: I’m much more likely to agree with my critics (and adjust my writing in response!). Five people could praise a favorite line and then if one person thought it was silly, I’d probably start leaning toward believing it was silly. Some of this is good, adaptive behavior: you WANT readers who will tell you what’s wrong with your story and push you to make it better. But some of it is just Insecure Writer Syndrome™. For some of us, if one reader criticizes something we wrote, we suddenly can’t see the scene the same way and it will bug us until we fix it.
There’s such a thing as too much of this, but most of us have a healthy level of ability to take criticism seriously. We won’t throw our manuscripts in the fireplace and quit writing forever if someone dislikes our work, but we’ll obsess over criticism and it will seem magnified in our minds. This is generally a good thing unless it paralyzes our ability to draft without too much fear. However, much worse than this is its opposite: the authors who savor only the praise and automatically ignore criticism. These are the authors who are more likely to defend their work in the face of criticism instead of taking a good look at what they can improve, and these are the authors who think they have nothing to learn.
So they don’t.

This seems like a bit too much, tbh. There’s no such thing as objectivity when it comes to deciding if a book is good or bad (I’m obviously talking about people who have their grammar, orthography and similar tecnical stuff sorted), but if five people say a part of a book is good and one says it’s bad, I wouldn’t even dream of jumping to the conclusion that the person who said it’s bad MUST be right. It’s a possibility, but it’s not the only one. Similarly, if five people say a part of a book is bad and one says it’s good, I would probably trust the majority.

This comic doesn’t imply that the critical person is objectively right. It’s a comic about how some of us are more likely to believe the critic even if we got praise for the same thing because we’re weirdasses who tend to be insecure. I hope you didn’t read this as a prescriptive message to always believe the critic and never believe the fan. If you’re interested in a more sophisticated discussion of how I recommend writers take criticism (and when to ignore it), I suggest this piece.

spacejuliet:

swankivy:

So You Write comic #38: Hater Love.

This may be exaggerated, but it’s true for me: I’m much more likely to agree with my critics (and adjust my writing in response!). Five people could praise a favorite line and then if one person thought it was silly, I’d probably start leaning toward believing it was silly. Some of this is good, adaptive behavior: you WANT readers who will tell you what’s wrong with your story and push you to make it better. But some of it is just Insecure Writer Syndrome™. For some of us, if one reader criticizes something we wrote, we suddenly can’t see the scene the same way and it will bug us until we fix it.

There’s such a thing as too much of this, but most of us have a healthy level of ability to take criticism seriously. We won’t throw our manuscripts in the fireplace and quit writing forever if someone dislikes our work, but we’ll obsess over criticism and it will seem magnified in our minds. This is generally a good thing unless it paralyzes our ability to draft without too much fear. However, much worse than this is its opposite: the authors who savor only the praise and automatically ignore criticism. These are the authors who are more likely to defend their work in the face of criticism instead of taking a good look at what they can improve, and these are the authors who think they have nothing to learn.

So they don’t.

This seems like a bit too much, tbh. There’s no such thing as objectivity when it comes to deciding if a book is good or bad (I’m obviously talking about people who have their grammar, orthography and similar tecnical stuff sorted), but if five people say a part of a book is good and one says it’s bad, I wouldn’t even dream of jumping to the conclusion that the person who said it’s bad MUST be right. It’s a possibility, but it’s not the only one. Similarly, if five people say a part of a book is bad and one says it’s good, I would probably trust the majority.

This comic doesn’t imply that the critical person is objectively right. It’s a comic about how some of us are more likely to believe the critic even if we got praise for the same thing because we’re weirdasses who tend to be insecure. I hope you didn’t read this as a prescriptive message to always believe the critic and never believe the fan. If you’re interested in a more sophisticated discussion of how I recommend writers take criticism (and when to ignore it), I suggest this piece.

Photo 21 Jul 17 notes So You Write comic #38: Hater Love.
This may be exaggerated, but it’s true for me: I’m much more likely to agree with my critics (and adjust my writing in response!). Five people could praise a favorite line and then if one person thought it was silly, I’d probably start leaning toward believing it was silly. Some of this is good, adaptive behavior: you WANT readers who will tell you what’s wrong with your story and push you to make it better. But some of it is just Insecure Writer Syndrome™. For some of us, if one reader criticizes something we wrote, we suddenly can’t see the scene the same way and it will bug us until we fix it.
There’s such a thing as too much of this, but most of us have a healthy level of ability to take criticism seriously. We won’t throw our manuscripts in the fireplace and quit writing forever if someone dislikes our work, but we’ll obsess over criticism and it will seem magnified in our minds. This is generally a good thing unless it paralyzes our ability to draft without too much fear. However, much worse than this is its opposite: the authors who savor only the praise and automatically ignore criticism. These are the authors who are more likely to defend their work in the face of criticism instead of taking a good look at what they can improve, and these are the authors who think they have nothing to learn.
So they don’t.

So You Write comic #38: Hater Love.

This may be exaggerated, but it’s true for me: I’m much more likely to agree with my critics (and adjust my writing in response!). Five people could praise a favorite line and then if one person thought it was silly, I’d probably start leaning toward believing it was silly. Some of this is good, adaptive behavior: you WANT readers who will tell you what’s wrong with your story and push you to make it better. But some of it is just Insecure Writer Syndrome™. For some of us, if one reader criticizes something we wrote, we suddenly can’t see the scene the same way and it will bug us until we fix it.

There’s such a thing as too much of this, but most of us have a healthy level of ability to take criticism seriously. We won’t throw our manuscripts in the fireplace and quit writing forever if someone dislikes our work, but we’ll obsess over criticism and it will seem magnified in our minds. This is generally a good thing unless it paralyzes our ability to draft without too much fear. However, much worse than this is its opposite: the authors who savor only the praise and automatically ignore criticism. These are the authors who are more likely to defend their work in the face of criticism instead of taking a good look at what they can improve, and these are the authors who think they have nothing to learn.

So they don’t.

Text 20 Jul 5 notes My followers think… .

I reblogged this and people responded to say what type of bender I would be. So:

One person said earth:

I think you’d be a waterbender.

tbh i feel like you would be a water bender, no idea why tho

I think you would be a water bender. Something about your personality I guess. Water flows around things, but it slowly wears down even rocks, which is what you do with your constantly educating idiots about Asexuality.

Rilly? Haha. Okay.

And four people said air:

Airbender. First off, you’ve totally got the light-and-airy pixie look going on. Second, you seem pretty good at keeping your cool in arguments and sticking to the facts/logos rather than getting overwhelmed or arguing pathos-style, which reminds me both of Yangchen and of airbending fighting styles. Third, you’d rock the partially-bald/partially-long hairdo.

my first instinct is air. not sure why tho

I see you as an airbender. You don’t take sass, you have a strong spiritual force (expressed outside of a religious context), you are strong willed and patient. You take time to appreciate the intricacies of a situation as opposed to taking a fiery and instantaneous approach to things. You remain level headed in the face of stresses and you have a tendency to evade certain things that will cause you pain. I might be all wrong, this is based purely off of observation and also I’m drunk :)

I see you as an airbender, actually

Well I guess the consensus is air, gonna go become a monk, brb.

NOBODY SAID I WOULD BE A FIREBENDER, HOW TRAGIC.

Photo 20 Jul 37,514 notes emboars:

bonus round: explain why it would fit them best!

emboars:

bonus round: explain why it would fit them best!

(Source: seers)

Link 20 Jul 109 notes The Comment Section: An Exploration of Negative Remarks on the Huffington Post Series About Asexuality»

redbeardace:

Throwing this out to the world.

Let me know if you have any feedback, in particular, if you have any better ways to respond to some of these comments.

I’d like this to be a living section of the site, with new additions from time to time.

I have nothing to say right now except that I will be adding this to my resources immediately. I’ve been eagerly awaiting your deconstruction of these comments and I’m really excited to read through everything you’ve mapped out here. I really like the idea of separating the types of comments into categories, giving examples of subcategories, distilling them, and giving a rationalization of why these attitudes (represented by these comments) are a problem.

Can’t even imagine the headaches that must’ve come from this, but thank you for creating this insightful resource and set of reactions.

Text 19 Jul 39 notes Bunch Marketing posts vile asexual invalidation

I haven’t posted a jackass for a while, so here I go with a doozy.

So, trigger warning and content warning for sexual assault, anti-woman commentary, asexual invalidation, accusations of appropriation, racism, suicide, and various personal attacks.

Also I curse a lot in my responses so sorry (but kind of not sorry)

Please know, going into this, that this person is DISGUSTING. I didn’t even respond to this. I went straight to his Google Plus page to block him, which is how I saw other posts and found out how disgusting he is in other ways. Besides posting a tirade about how unnecessary asexuality awareness education is on my video, he had other reprehensible, horrifying posts.

He posted multiple songs and comments that included the n-word. He left comments to women vloggers that he would like to smack them up and hit them, or asked questions about what parts of their body should be sprayed with semen. He posted on a video about suicide resources that human life is worthless and the person SHOULD go ahead and do it. He referred to a person making a video about anxiety and depression as “another braindead bleached twat and her first world problems.” Just an overall horrible sack of filth person.

Here’s the comment he left on my video International Asexuality Conference: Leadership Q&A. I will respond below, though I did not actually engage this prick.

Bunch Marketing:

An asexual “conference” is silly. Activism? lol, this is a joke. It reminds me of a bunch of kids having a club meeting in their tree house. This is nothing more than an attempt to draw off attention from the press the gays are getting… without being gay. “Hey look at us we aren’t gay but we need some attention too!” Sorry, no. It’s childish. Oh the oppression and horror you face by not having sex. When you got religious groups that hate you, states that won’t let you marry, or jobs that won’t hire you because you are asexual, then you need to have a conference to discuss the issues in the community. Then you can have elected leaders sit on a panel and lay it out. But you don’t. What real reason (other than attention) do asexuals have to hold a conference? You don’t have sex. There’s nothing there! You might as well have a conference discussing thin air. There is no real community. There are no serious issues. What is there truly to debate? It’s a private matter in not engaging in sexual activity. It starts and stops in your pants. What issues are you dealing with by not doing something? What religion tells you that being asexual is wrong? What is so god damn important about not using your sexual organs that needs leadership and activism? You deal with none of these things. It’s not your spotlight to share. Sit in the corner and mind your business. If asexuals need a conference then so do people who don’t eat tomatoes. So do people who don’t listen to certain kinds of music. Yes, there needs to be a conference for people who don’t like country music because they deal with the same issues that asexuals deal with. As in: none.

Blacks and gays have rights to the spotlight. Discrimination and all the things they are still dealing with. There are appointed leaders who lay out the issues in their respective communities and decide what is going to be legally done about them. For you to sit there and act like asexual people need a conference or leadership, you are simply delusional. And first of all, who the hell elected you? You’d be the last person I’d want speaking for me. That’s all this is. A way for you to put yourself over and promote yourself as the asexual “guru/leader”. This asexual label is the only hobby you have lady. It’s sad. I realize your old cobwebbed snatch doesn’t get any attention but this isn’t the way to satisfy it. Let the gays have their time in the sun and stay out of it. Grow the fuck up. Take your hair out of the pigtails and grow the fuck up Skankivy.

And here’s a pick-apart of this dipshit’s comments, though the shittiness of them is self-explanatory:

An asexual “conference” is silly.

Then don’t go to one, asshole.

Activism? lol, this is a joke. It reminds me of a bunch of kids having a club meeting in their tree house.

Guess you’ll never know what the grown-ups do at their conferences since you’d never be caught dead at one, loser.

This is nothing more than an attempt to draw off attention from the press the gays are getting… without being gay. “Hey look at us we aren’t gay but we need some attention too!” Sorry, no. It’s childish.

Yeah, we totally want to steal someone else’s attention. This is all about attention. We want to get the cameras pointing at us so we can talk about nothing. Or, when it happens, instead of rolling your eyes and snorting about how useless it is, you could find out what the message is. Ha, instead of taking really poorly aimed potshots at what you think we’re about. (Also, if the idea of us getting attention makes steam shoot out of your ears so, then stop giving it to us.)

Oh the oppression and horror you face by not having sex.

Oh the words you put in our mouths.

Oh the complete failure of a definition you stick on us.

(Neither the word “oppression” nor the word “horror” was used in this video. Neatly, said video also discusses, explicitly, what challenges asexual people actually do face, and what the “laundry list” could look like. I imagine that’s hard to accept when you’re too busy pretending the adults who get shit done over here are actually playing make-believe in a treehouse.)

When you got religious groups that hate you, states that won’t let you marry, or jobs that won’t hire you because you are asexual, then you need to have a conference to discuss the issues in the community.

Wow, it’s almost as if you watched the video and made a list of the problems we actually talked about facing, but put them in the column of “doesn’t affect asexual people” by mistake!

A whole chunk of this video involves the explicit job-related discrimination Sara Beth herself dealt with for identifying as an asexuality activist on her résumé. David also talked about it affecting his ability to get hired. Also, LOL at the idea that we have no issues because our issues don’t exactly mirror what LGB queer marginalized groups face.

Then you can have elected leaders sit on a panel and lay it out. But you don’t. What real reason (other than attention) do asexuals have to hold a conference? You don’t have sex. There’s nothing there!

LOL we’re not elected. There’s no president of asexuality.

If there ever is, though, I’d like to be a princess, please, and have a tiara in the shape of an ace of spades.

And actually some asexual people do have sex, though if we can help it most of us don’t, but I guess defining us entirely as something we don’t do and pretending the whole world is blissfully fine with that makes it easier on your smirking, shitty ass.

What reason is there to hold a conference? Actually besides this Leadership Q&A panel there were TWENTY other sessions. Five were caucuses, in which aces with disabilities and mental illnesses, ace survivors of sexual assault, autistic aces, aces of color, and trans/nonbinary aces got their own space to discuss their own issues with each other and/or offer/receive support. There was an informational panel about the history of asexuality. There was a gray/demi panel. There was an “am I asexual?” session for newbies to the community. There was one on engaging with the mental health community—which, incidentally, is one of the big problems you say we don’t face, involving discrimination by mental health professionals. There was a trans workshop. A discussion of asexuality outside the English-speaking world. A romantic/aromantic identities discussion. An asexuality/ethnicity discussion. A presentation on current research on the subject. A touch/consent workshop. A session about organizing on college campuses and other meetup groups. A presentation on content creation. A panel on relationships and dating while ace. A research presentation covering methodological and theoretical issues. And a discussion on LGBTQ+ communities and how aces engage/participate.

Gonna guess you wouldn’t have expected us to have a need for more than twenty separate discussions throughout the day, but that’s what happens when you refuse to fucking listen to what we say our issues are.

You might as well have a conference discussing thin air. There is no real community. There are no serious issues. What is there truly to debate? It’s a private matter in not engaging in sexual activity. It starts and stops in your pants.

No real community, huh. Guess the 300+ attendees who came from around the world just to attend this event are imaginary, and I guess there aren’t thousands of asexuality-specific blogs right here on this website, and I guess thousands of people totally don’t subscribe to my content. I also guess a publisher was very stupid to sign me since nobody’s out there to buy my book.

Also we were generally not “debating.” We were organizing, making connections, and giving each other resources. What a sad, ragey little man you have to be to tell us our efforts aren’t about anything because YOU think it’s about our pants.

What issues are you dealing with by not doing something? What religion tells you that being asexual is wrong? What is so god damn important about not using your sexual organs that needs leadership and activism? You deal with none of these things. It’s not your spotlight to share. Sit in the corner and mind your business.

I think I’m gonna need you to find that corner and sit in it yourself.

Especially since when we answer you—over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again—about what the hell we have to worry about, and you SIMPLY WILL NOT LISTEN, what are we supposed to do?

For the record, my book covers religion. There are LOTS of religious beliefs that explicitly tell us being asexual is wrong, and still more that say yeah you can be asexual but don’t you dare expect a relationship because marriage is “for” if you can’t be celibate. Ass.

If asexuals need a conference then so do people who don’t eat tomatoes. So do people who don’t listen to certain kinds of music. Yes, there needs to be a conference for people who don’t like country music because they deal with the same issues that asexuals deal with. As in: none.

As soon as people who don’t eat tomatoes or people who don’t like country music live in a society where they are marginalized for not participating in something considered central and necessary to life and happiness, that will be an accurate analogy. But last time I checked, nobody has grown up seeing “basic human needs, like food, water, shelter, and country music” in their textbooks. Common cultural narratives do not generally lead to people being repeatedly harassed, shamed, cajoled, or bullied for not eating tomatoes, nor is it likely that a tomato-lover will react to your tomato-hate by holding you down and force-feeding you tomatoes to “fix you” due to a belief that all people must love tomatoes to be well. Furthermore, if not feeling the inclination to participate in either of those experiences often led to being referred to as/being treated as inhuman or alien, I imagine people who grew up that way would have an awful lot to discuss in trying to get by/find happiness in a world that sends them poisonous messages about people like them every day through media and personal interaction.

tl;dr: fuck your specious fucking analogy, asswipe.

Blacks and gays have rights to the spotlight. Discrimination and all the things they are still dealing with.

Good to know you’re the arbiter of whose “rights to the spotlight” are reasonable.

Also “blacks and gays” lol.

Just goes to show you that marginalization is pretty obviously happening toward our (nonexistent, according to you) communities when you get this fucking angry if we even want to have a conversation with each other.

There are appointed leaders who lay out the issues in their respective communities and decide what is going to be legally done about them. For you to sit there and act like asexual people need a conference or leadership, you are simply delusional.

Oh, that’s funny, because in the video you’re shitting on we talk about how we participated in the ENDA talks (FEDERAL NON-DISCRIMINATION LEGISLATION, DICKCHEESE) and got Planned Parenthood educators to include info on asexuality in their sex ed talks and collaborated with the Trevor Project to provide asexuality resources to SUICIDAL FRIGGING ASEXUAL TEENS (who I’m sure you think also don’t have problems but fuck them because blacks and gays, only some people have real problems, only when you tell us they’re painful enough).

Maybe it’s a huge goddamn revelation that we’re this organized and have been for years, but calm down, holy shit.

Nah I’m just kidding, obviously we just drink Kool-Aid in our treehouses, talk about how much it sucks that no one understands us not having sex, and whine about how mean our parents are.

And first of all, who the hell elected you? You’d be the last person I’d want speaking for me. That’s all this is. A way for you to put yourself over and promote yourself as the asexual “guru/leader”.

"This is a session for you to talk to the three of us, and also to share new ideas to generate some new conversation. The three of us are far from the only leaders in the asexual community, we just agreed to do this panel. And so, we’d like to, at the beginning, to say that there are lots of other people that also do incredible and amazing work in the asexual community. We’re just the ones on this particular panel that’s by no means complete."

—Sara Beth Brooks, in the INTRODUCTION to the video you’re fucking clawing your eyes out over

You sure do have an impressively large hardon for accusing me of feeding on attention, though. If I was into big dicks that might even get me excited.

This asexual label is the only hobby you have lady. It’s sad.

Sweet burn! Ooooh!

This is far from the first time someone claims this is all I have in my life and gloats about how sad that is, while ignoring that they are getting this impression from a video on YouTube after looking no further. Not that I actually expect any due diligence from someone like you, but this is an unusually comprehensive amount of obliviousness. If I judged you based on what you do on YouTube, I’d guess all you have in your life is posting racist, incendiary, mocking, sexist, foul comments on people’s videos. Hmm, that might actually be true. But holy shit, you don’t even have to leave YouTube to see all the other shit I do.

Man, I sure wish my life had something in it besides my asexual label. If only I could write multiple novels, or sell writing to mainstream publishers, or read a book a week, or make cool multitrack singing videos, or draw two webcomics, or regularly help other writers with their books by being active in the writing community, or go to anime conventions (BUT OH GOD THAT MIGHT BE JUST TOO NERDY), or hang out with friends (nope, only had three friend visits last week, I’m just not popular), or run four blogs, or bake great recipes, or go to musicals, or play tennis, or create handicrafts. If only I was living a burstingly full life that consisted of anything, anything at all, besides calling myself asexual and making a media career out of not having sex. (You know, because you totally get paid for going on TV and getting interviewed.)

I realize your old cobwebbed snatch doesn’t get any attention but this isn’t the way to satisfy it.

The fact that you are trying to use sexual inactivity as an insult is ironic in a way that does not escape me.

But let’s just have a round of applause for yet another person who thinks “LOL GET LAID, LOSER” works well an all-purpose zinger.

Let the gays have their time in the sun and stay out of it.

This is an extraordinarily appropriate failed comparison on your part, Bunch Marketing, because I’m pretty sure the sun does not actually get blotted out for any gay people if I stand in it. Though people like you frequently try to assert otherwise, attention is not a finite resource that we’re explicitly stealing from other activist causes if we believe our issues warrant discussion. Is space on YouTube being denied to any LGBTQ issues because I made an asexuality video? Is media going to run out of air time if they put one of our talking heads on the television for 2.5 minutes? Yeah I’m pretty sure no one group is buried in obscurity because we stampeded in and kicked them off the stage in their prime. Not to mention if we have “no real community,” what power do you really think we have to appropriate on such a scale that it’s worthy of this rant?

The only finite resource I see here is space in your diaper, man, because you seem to have SERIOUSLY filled that real estate up.

Grow the fuck up. Take your hair out of the pigtails and grow the fuck up Skankivy.

Maybe nobody has explained this to you yet honey but the “skank” substitution you used here generally implies promiscuity and it’s very doubtful I’d embrace such a thing if my identity orbits solely around not fucking.

And you can suck my proverbial dick because my pigtails are goddamn cute. I wore them when I was two and I wore them when I was sixteen and I’m rocking them at thirty-six and if I’m lucky enough to live until I go gray I’m going to have some silver motherfucking pigtails. And if that makes shitstains like you vomit laughable insults until you’re foaming at the mouth then I’m glad to have wasted your time.

—Signed, Swankivy, Princess of Asexuality, subsisting on attention and purloined gay limelight, in a fucking badass tiara


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